LOL Cool Redneck Joke

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Figured u guys might like this, buddie in Anarchy-Online just posted this in guild chat lol, funny stuff


Two rednecks are walking toward each other when one sees the other carrying a bag on his shoulder. He yells out, "Billy Bob! What you got in the bag?" Billy Bob replies, "Aw, just some chickens, Cletus." Cletus think to himself and says, "Hey, if I can guess how many chickens you got in that there bag, can I have one of 'em?" Billy Bob says, "Shoot, if you can do that you can have both of 'em!" Cletus squints his eyes and says, "Um... Five?"







EDIT!:: turned into a joke thread, he had a few that i thought were funnay::

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Two friends, Sullivan and O'Doule, worked together at the Guinness brewery in Dublin. They hadn't been working there very long when one day, with no warning, O'Doule fell into one of the vats. To make a long story short, Sullivan's lifelong pal drowned. Sullivan, being O'Doule's best friend, felt obligated to go to O'Doule's widow and break the bad news to her. He walked to the house and knocked on the door. When the widow O'Doule answered, he bowed his head respectfully and told her what had happened. "I'm sorry to be the one to tell ye," he said, "but I'm afraid Seamus has fallen into one of the vats at work and drowned. He's off to meet his maker." "Alas," cried the widow. "The poor man couldn't swim a stroke." "The hell he couldn't," replied Sullivan, "He got out three times to pee"

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While walking down the street one day, a U.S. senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem to address. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the man. "Well, I'd like to but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity." "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator. "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance he sees a club, and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and dressed in evening attire. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that, before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the doors reopen on heaven, where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven." So 24 hours pass with the head of state joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity." The senator reflects for a minute and then answers, "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now all there is is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?" The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning... Today you voted."



LOL BURN ^^^

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PG-13 belowe ::Sexual Content::




One day a guy goes to his doctor and says, "Doc I have these real bad headaches. What should I do?" The doctor replies, "Well, to get rid of my headaches I just have sex with my wife." They both laugh. A week later the patient returns. The doctor asks, "How are you feeling?" The patient smiles and replies, "You were right! I feel so much better. And by the way, Doc, you have a lovely home."

[LA_MERC_Diesel]

lol :laugh:
a twist on the chineese sick joke..lol

[NoXiOuS]

rahhhhblaaa!

[LA_MERC_Drifter]

lol!

[}{y|3ri|)]

what server and character do you play under in AO?

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Atlantean, and any of the infamous HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO's ;o i'm in Redemption. this name i use on forums is actually my 208 enf

[Silent_Killer]

LOL funny

[}{y|3ri|)]

reason why i asked is cause i played a 203 doc on rimor.

[Hoooo]

pfft rimor r nubi, come to atlantean where its at =D i got a 208 enf a 193 agent, and some other crap that i'm not gonna mension, all twinks mainly though; o

[LA_MERC_Shadow]

LOL

[LA_MERC_MadMAX]

Here's one for ya - PG13 as well...

Now pay attention to this lesson. It may come in handy sometime.

A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a
horrible sunburn.
He goes to the hospital and is promptly admitted after being diagnosed
with second degree burns.
With his skin already starting to blister and the severe pain he was in,
the doctor prescribes continuous intravenous feeding with saline,
electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours.
The nurse who is rather astounded, says, "What good will Viagra do him
Doctor?
"It'll keep the sheets off his legs."